Babies, and Charlie's Theory of Hands

There's a Baby on the floor.

It's not my People's Baby, either. It's the little girl Baby that comes to my house sometimes for the day. I don't know why its mother leaves it here and then comes back for it; is she indecisive? Is it here to play with our Baby? Do I really care?

This one walks on 2 feet like big People. My Baby- I mean, my People's Baby- is still satisfactorally quadripedal, but I'm noticing more tendencies toward two-footedness on a daily basis. This disturbs me; I thought he was going to be a NORMAL critter. He's still a friendly little thing, though, and I guess that's what's important. The advantage to People having hands instead of lovely front paws, of course, is that they can use them to give lovely rubbins and massages to cats. In fact, I'm pretty sure that Hands are the result of selective breeding; we Cats needed People to be able to rub us and also to open cans and bags of treats. And open doors.

What was I saying before I was explaining my Theory of Hands? Right... the babies. Well, I think they're OK, but many of my Catster friends would disagree. Some cats run and hide from them because Babies like to grab and pull and smack. I personally (or felineally) figure, "Hey, it's attention. I'll take it where I can get it!" Sometimes this Girl-Baby wants to give too much, and I get cornered under a chair or in a corner, but The Woman usually calls her off, and then I can escape to the kitchen. I don't like having to jump over the Baby Gate to get to my food and Crappe Chateau (litter box to you), but I have to admit that it makes a handy escape route.

So the little critter is asleep here on the floor, splayed out on my kneading-blanket. Well... I say it's mine, The Woman says that it was a gift for the Baby, and I just borrow it sometimes. This has led to some serious disagreements, which generally end with me being picked up and dumped off the blanket.

Grrr... there are disadvantages to them having hands...

Well, all's quiet, so I'm going to use this time to go lick my arse. The People like to call it "playing the cello," because apparently that's what it looks like I'm doing. Whatever. Then I might go into the bedroom and wake The Man up to gicve me love. The Woman is up and available, and that's exactly why only The Man will do.

I love messing with their big heads!